1. Can’t use an Umbrella

Source: Canva

Don’t you hate it when an umbrella is too wide for a doorway? And how you then have to abandon a perfectly good umbrella, because there’s absolutely nothing you can do to make it smaller?

Yeah, me too.

2. Looking at the Solar Eclipse

Source: Screenshot/YouTube

Even schoolchildren know you shouldn’t look straight into an eclipse. Even Ivanka knows how very, very bad it is for you.

But apparently, though, her dad missed the memo. He looked at an eclipse with his bare eyes in August 2017, despite being surrounded by people in protective glasses.

Does that seem like smarter behavior than Biden has shown?

3. Drinking water like a “new vampire eats a small animal”

Source: Screenshot/YouTube

No, that description isn’t an exaggeration. Trump stopped in the middle of a press briefing to hold and drink from a glass of water in the most bizarre way possible. Of course, the moment immediately went viral:

Trump drinks his water like a new vampire eats a small animal. pic.twitter.com/DfWktYzmY9

— crudedoodle (@crudedoodle) December 19, 2017

If it seems petty to point out the POTUS’s inability to sip like a regular person, remember that Trump himself repeatedly mocked Marco Rubio for a similar gaffe back in 2013. What’s that saying about glass houses and throwing stones?

4. Putting Halloween candy on a trick-or-treater’s head

Source: Wikimedia

We were left with a lot of questions after the White House Halloween celebration in which Trump put a piece of candy on a trick-or-treater’s head, rather than in their bag. Was Trump trying to combine a trick and a treat? Are millionaires used to making their underlings hand out candy? On what planet is this normal behavior?

Check out video of the moment, as well as comedians’ reactions, here.

5. Toilet paper on his shoe

Source: Pikrepo

Sure, it could happen to anyone. But the fact is that it happened to one of the most powerful men on the planet—and in an apparent Emperor’s New Clothes twist, no one around him bothered mentioning it.

Soggy president takes toilet paper with him: pic.twitter.com/m54VTAgxrE

— Deadspin (@Deadspin) October 5, 2018

You just KNOW that if Biden had a similar accident, Trump would permanently nickname him “Toilet Paper Joe,” or something like that.

6. Doesn’t remember anyone’s name…including Melania

Source: Screenshot / Twitter

The next time Trump feels like mocking Biden for a momentary memory lapse, he should take a minute to watch this video and then reconsider:

7. Trump shouldn’t talk, period

Source: Screenshot / YouTube

…and the next time Trump wants to make fun of Biden for bungling a sentence or two, he should watch this and consider if it’s really wise for him to open his mouth.

8. He says he didn’t say it, but he did

Source: Wikipedia

Trump gave a rambling statement where he claimed that he never said Mexico would pay for the border wall by writing out a check:

“When during the campaign I would say, ‘Mexico’s going to pay for it,’ obviously I never said this and I never meant they’re going to write out a check”

The only problem, of course, is that he actually did say that. Here’s what Trump said when questioned about the details of his claim on the Sean Hannity show:

“They’ll pay. They’ll pay. In one form or another,” Trump responded. “They may even write us a check by the time they see what happens. They may.”

Trump probably shouldn’t make fun of Biden’s memory when he can’t even keep his own words straight.

9. Struggles with geography

Source: Unsplash

For a “very stable genius,” Trump sure doesn’t know much about geography.

.@realDonaldTrump seems to think Paris is in Germany. (It kind of was for a few years in the 1940s, I guess.) https://t.co/RF5e3Rb1VO

— George Conway (@gtconway3d) January 28, 2020

Check out a long, long list of Trump’s best (or worst, depending on how you look at it) map mistakes here.

10. The Sniffing

Source: Canva

Yes, Biden’s got some sniffing issues—no one can deny that. But Trump is really, really not the right person to try to take the moral high ground here.

58 times. He sniffed 58 times during his address. Here are all of them. pic.twitter.com/GoAIfsfdLd

— Timothy Burke (@bubbaprog) January 8, 2020

Not only was his nose out of control, Trump also slurred his speech and just straight-up did not sound okay during the talk.

Maybe instead of going after Biden, Trump’s team should spend more time protecting Trump from the biggest threat to his competence: himself.