Nevermind voter suppression, Nikki Haley has found the ‘real emergency’ — popcorn delivery delays

Wikimedia / Canva

Now that deliveries from the Popcorn Factory are delayed, Republicans may be noticing the problems besetting the US Post Office. Trump acolyte Nikki Haley sent out an angry —and now viral — Tweet in response to not just one, but two late deliveries of popcorn.

A search of Haley’s Twitter feed reveals precisely zero tweets of concern about the US Postal Service, but a popcorn delay has the needle pinned on her meter of concern.

WHERE IS MY POPCORN???

Unsplash / Georgia Vagim

As millions of Americans fritter away time by the front door, waiting for life-saving medications, Nikki Haley has her finger on the pulse. If she can’t rely on Popcorn Factory deliveries, Haley is hitting the panic button.

Who is Nikki Haley?

Nikki Haley being interviewed after sending classified material over insecure Blackberry phone.

Screenshot / NBC News

Haley, a former governor of South Carolina, is considered by many Republicans to be a top contender as a future presidential candidate. She served as Trump’s ambassador to the United Nations, during which time she gained a bit of extra notoriety for sending classified information over her personal, unsecured Blackberry. (“Lock her up,” anyone? Nah.)

Haley has a history of bragging about the racial tolerance of South Carolina and the GOP. She has also echoed Trump’s sentiments against the notion of police reform. But don’t let these typical GOP talking points fool you; Nikki Haley might be a perfect candidate among Republicans for whom popcorn delivery is a vital issue.

Demand timely Popcorn Factory deliveries!

Popcorn Factory

Pixabay / Jill Wellington

American’s would surely recognize the leadership capabilities of anyone who could guarantee timely popcorn delivery. Helping the US Postal Service return to a previously functional state would be a small side benefit, but I’m sure you could find a few who would appreciate it.

Trump Postmaster Louis DeJoy has not properly prioritized popcorn

Delays in Popcorn Factory deliveries alert top Republicans to US Postal struggle. 1

Wikimedia

Trump’s new postmaster has slowed delivery of the mail, potentially as a voter suppression tactic. This has resulted in a delay of Popcorn Factory shipments.


Nice mask, Mr. DeJoy. Now maybe you can quit destroying the US Post Office.

Voter suppression is merely a symptom of tragic popcorn delivery delays

Sign that says voting cancelled

Flickr / Democracy Chronicles

Patriots like Stacy Abrams fight to defend the voting rights of all US citizens. Popcorn Factory delivery delays may finally shine a dim light on the small side issue of voter suppression.

There is no excuse for late popcorn

Flatlay photo of numerous clocks

Canva

Nikki goes right to go to the heart of the problem. While others are worried about inconsequential national frivolities, Halley has brought it home for us.

No, it’s not about the pandemic. It’s about the heartrending and obvious need for federal intervention to curtail Popcorn Factory delays.

Republicans share Nikki’s horror at delayed popcorn

GOP Ostrich

Flickr/Storm Williams

Haley is not the only Trump lackey who feels wounded by the delay of Popcorn Factory product.

What if it’s not just popcorn? What if it’s other snacks!

Jill Wellington / Pixabay 

This Popcorn Factory delay could also affect hot cocoa and gummy worms! Oh, yeah, also payments, official correspondence, and life-saving medications.


Here’s the thing: we don’t have to imagine.

Wait, did you try contacting the Popcorn Factory?

A photograph of a gavel and the scales of justice.

Pixabay

Nikki Haley is far too important to waste time with Popcorn Factory customer service. She is taking her case directly to the people.

The Popcorn Factory is just one more small business…

Man standing in a mechanic shop

Unsplash / Alev Takil

…one more small business that will suffer during Trump’s deadly dawdling.

Let’s wrap up with the kernel of this story

Abdulhakeem Samae / Pixabay

Don’t fall for this absurd Popcorn Factory propaganda. “It’s a great day to reach out to a friend”? What kind of subliminal fascist messaging will they try next?

Popmoji?!? Where are McCarthy and the House Un-American Activities Committee when you need them?

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